SILLY SONGS
or
Order
"Silly Songs" by email: click here
Have a little
listen
Hannibal The Cannibal *
Hotel Torresmolinos *
Buttplug
* Elephant
Shite
Review
"If you
like daft stuff you'll love this new album by Brian Damage and Krysstal"
TIME
OUT (London)
Shortly after meeting
in 2000 at The Edinburgh Festival
Brian Damage
and Krysstal produced this orgasmic masterpiece of aural delight
Maybe they
should have waited a little longer
After almost
nine months of hard labour they have given birth to this wonderfully seedy
CD
showing a
subtlety never before seen in Brian's act.
Definitely a
five star effort
F*****ng
great!
A
Scotsman
Eleven Wicked
Tracks
1.
Pleasure 2. Hotel Torresmolinos 3. Buttplug 4. Half as Nice
5.
Grey Haired Medley 6. Hannibal the Cannibal
7. Elephant Shite 8.The Penis
Song 9. I'm F*cked
10.
Bunch of C*nts 11. Knock Knock
Silly Songs by Brian Damage & Krysstal
An
album of semi musical ditties written and deformed to the least of their
debilities
by
Brian Damage and Krysstal for no reason other than to satisfy their
own gigantic egos and miniscule bank balances
and
to finance future goals in the avoidance of proper jobs
Credit Crunch Special Price
*** Only £5 + Postage & Packing ***
Available
wherever Brian & Krysstal appear
Or by
email: briandamagekrysstal@yahoo.com.au
Please
note: postage and packing are not included in the price
Credit
Cards accepted (fees apply)
1. Pleasure
As we
all know, smoking is VERY good for you... especially if you collect the
coupons.
This
song illustrates that inside every silver cloud... there is indeed a dark brown
lining.
2. Hotel Torresmolinos
Brits
abroad... conjures up a picture doesn't it?
We
Brits have an image to maintain in Europe and we feel that in some small way,
this
song helps to point out some small improvements that could be made in our
approach.
3. Buttplug
Every
now and then a word comes along that just begs to be made into a song
Inspired by Brat & Pret,
two chatroom hostesses
without
whom the word "buttplug" would have remained a mystery in the annals
of our minds.
4. Half as Nice
We
can't help feeling that this song may have cost William Hague the last election
not
to mention the fact that he's a bit of a .... We're quite proud of it actually.
5. Grey Haired Medley
After
years of playing in bands like this
is it
any wonder that Brian turned in desperation to the Comedy Circuit?
6. Hannibal the Cannibal
A
bloody good song dedicated to vegetarians everywhere....
I
wonder if veggies taste different?
7. Elephant Shite
We
did some gigs in South Africa recently
everybody
we met said "you MUST go to the Kruger National Park!"
"You'll
see man-eating leopards, crocodiles, snakes, spiders, hippos, giraffes,
elephants"
They
said "Don't forget, the lions just LOVE to be stroked while they're
eating"
Sadly,
we didn't see any lions, leopards, crocodiles or any of the others.... all we
saw was....
8. The Penis Song
Stand
up comedy is a golden opportunity for anyone who has anything of any relevance
to say
on
any topic under the sun, to get up in front of a group of people and spout off
about it.
So
why oh why do we still spout off about our spouts?
Well,
we've managed to keep it reasonably clean so far....
9. I'm F**ked
OK so
we gave up.... it's all downhill from here.
10. Bunch of C*nts
Dedicated
to audiences everywhere who fail to see that to enjoy comedy....
it
helps if you listen!
11. Knock Knock
Brian
attempts to help Krysstal hone her comedic skills...
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Email:
briandamagekrysstal@yahoo.com.au
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